on poetry in the workplace

i like writing haikus. once upon a time i wrote a weekly haiku for colleagues at work and i am fairly certain it is why i got promoted.

these haikus were so outrageously popular that instead of fielding endless questions about when i would write someone’s haiku, i implemented a “hai-queue” on a google sheet so everyone knew their spot in line. unfortunately the hai-queue made me realize the company was growing too quickly for me to get to everyone just 1 weekly haiku at a time.

deflated, i shut down my operation but not before vowing to bring poetry back into the workplace again some day.

and so oops a haiku was born. oops a haiku is a slack bot that discovers the poet in all of us by pointing out when we have accidentally written a haiku. here is how it works in slack:

bob: hey @carol did you get that memo?
carol: about the toaster boycott? yeah! stick it to the toaster lobby, bob!
oops a haiku:

about the toaster /
boycott? yeah! stick it to the /
toaster lobby, bob!

- @carol

bob: ha, talk about poetic justice, @carol!

i’m working out the kinks and seeking testers. anyone want to add oops a haiku to their slack? DM me/send me an email/advertise on one of the podcasts i regularly listen to and i’ll get you sorted.

here is how i made the el guapo sandwich from honeyhole, a seattle sandwich institution.

1. did you know: baguettes can double as blunt weapons?

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2. did you know: if you pronounce veggies with a ‘w’ it sounds like you are saying “wedgies”?

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3. ok enough funny business let’s get serious and slather some ranch on this baguette.

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4. jk, did you know: onions are a leading cause for people enjoying their food?

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5. did you know: green peppers don’t taste as good as red peppers but they have their moments? for example, in this sandwich?

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6. ok enough funny business let’s throw an unreasonable quantity of cheddar and smoked gouda onto this sandwich.

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7. this is a toaster oven, not to be confused with a toaster, a kitchen implement that is known to set fire to buildings everywhere.

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8. you will probably want to stick this back in the toaster oven for a while like i did just to get things melty enough, but remember the alamo tomatoes.

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9. a recreation of seattle-based honeyhole’s el guapo.

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